Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Right? Wrong!
Women will say your appearance doesn’t matter. Perhaps you actually believe them. Don’t!
Everyone has standards. Every day people form judgments about your quality as a person based mainly on your appearance, down to the details. Those judgments are instantaneous, instinctual and often long lasting, especially if negative.
When you go to a job interview, do you project that confident, capable attitude that will land you the job? Or will the interviewer think "Good resume, but what a loser!"
Do women think of you as a good friend, only as a good friend? No messages received on dating sites? Very common.
Maybe you look "okay," but even an "ugly" person is unlikely to be directly informed of an appearance problem.
Several television shows have done undercover segments about how appearance affects behavior, perhaps most notably a September 2005 episode of Dr. Phil in which the male featured is treated poorly after an "ugly" makeover. It simply demonstrates what formal research has already discovered.
Psychological studies over the years have shown people commonly assign characteristics such as friendliness, popularity, sexuality, socioeconomic status, intelligence, and honesty based on the subject’s appearance. What’s more, studies show that there is some accuracy to those judgments and that people exaggerate their accuracy. A date in a boring sweatshirt and worn-out discount blue jeans becomes a boring, unambitious date. A college professor in shorts, sandals, and an athletic jersey becomes a careless, attendance-not-required instructor. An innovative proposal made by a man with wild hair becomes a crazy scheme.
People make judgments when they see themselves, too.
Your appearance affects your own functioning. Judith Rasband, CEO of Conselle Institute of Image Management, the leading professional image consultant training facility in the field, teaches that appearance affects the way you think, feel, and act and the way others react. Not changing out of your pajamas makes you not bother to pay your bills or eat carelessly. Just as wearing uncomfortable clothes distracts you, standing out when you don’t want to makes you feel self-conscious, which itself is reflected in appearance-harming behaviors such as poor posture. Isolation and depression - it can lead to that, but it shouldn't. When you see yourself, you should see your good qualities and feel your life is moving in the right direction. On the positive side, studies indicate that appearance improvement can increase confidence, which is reflected in body language that influences attractiveness. Appearance improvement can even boost performance. And in a world that is increasingly disconnected and image-obsessed, where job security is less and women do care more about looks than they used to, confidence and performance matter.
Perhaps partly because of that, as research reveals, most men would welcome appearance guidance and feedback. But help for men who want adult style is mostly limited to bodybuilding and business dress and the people you happen to know. So men mix dubious sources and guesswork or give up and try not to worry about it.
Until you have the skills, you should worry. Appearance affects you, even if you act like it doesn't. Address it, for a better present and future. The broad spectrum of the physical aspect, which is far more than just clothing, is the new frontier of men's image management, and Gentleman’s Best Friend is here to help you.
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Click here to see how we provide an easy, comprehensive solution for all men, covering everything from grooming, clothing, underlying physique and face to the secrets of inner confidence and a winning image.
Some parts adapted, with permission, from "The Power of Personal Appearance," by Conselle Institute of Image Management.
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